Eastenders: You Win Some, You Lose Some

(Tuesday 6^th – Friday 9^th October 2020)

At first, Mick didn’t believe a word of what Frankie had to say but then clearly recognised her mother’s name. While Frankie had initially been told her father walked out on her mother when he learned she was pregnant, she recently found letters from Mick which proved otherwise and wanted to find him. Now, I have to say, I am shocked that Mick has completely rejected the poor girl. He has always been such a moral, family man. But he told her that Linda didn’t know about her mother and was an alcoholic who would never cope with the news that he had another child. Well, to be honest, we’re all a bit stunned that Eastenders have re-written Mick’s entire history.

So, while Mick was all over the place, struggling to come to terms with the latest revelations and snapping at Linda, little did he know that Max has now thrown his hat into the ring. Well, I mean, who needs to worry? It’s not like Max is an infamous lothario or anything… Although Linda didn’t confess about drinking, she did confess to Max kissing her. While Mick weirdly didn’t react to Linda, he was quick to warn Max away from his wife.

Mick warns Max away from his wife…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Callum’s superior tried and failed to get him to wear a wire at home to capture any dodgy conversations but all Phil is really concerned with right now is getting custody of Raymond anyway. Like Denise, he has started visiting the hospital and befriending his grandmother, Ellie.

Callum decided that enough was enough and he was out. Now, the thing I am most stunned about is the revelation that Callum thought this was a legal operation. I have been reporting this all wrong. I assumed he knew that being a completely bent cop was illegal. But apparently, he is actually that stupid. Perhaps his career on the police force actually should be this short. Lockdown must have seriously got to the writers. I mean, what are they doing to this boy?!

From dumb to evil, Suki handed over Jag’s bloodied jeans to the police and fitted him up for the attack on Martin ‘for the sake of the family’. Basically, he was stepping out of line by suggesting she gain some ethics and also daring to date Habiba. So he was whipped off by the police, presumably never to be heard from again as the actor has left the show. It’s a shame. It took me a while to warm to him but I quite liked him by the end. Ash did attempt to persuade her brother to change his plea but in the end, neither of them were brave enough to stand up to their mother.

One person brave enough or dumb enough to throw their weight around with Suki was Stacey. She mouthed off to her in the Square and by the end of the day, Suki had put their rent up, claiming they now owed hundreds as the rent Daniel had put down in advance had now run out. It was then down to Kush, who appears to be fast developing a gambling habit, to save the day with a win to keep their nasty landlady at bay.

Gray loses it in court…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Worried about both Gray and the kids, Whitney demanded that Gray stepped down from her case and be there for his family instead. However, he opted to abandon the funeral (which happened off screen) and pitched up at the court where he basically heckled proceedings until he was thrown out. Just as he was being removed, he practically told everyone that Leo got what he deserved that Whitney would do it again if she got the chance. Ever so helpful there, Gray.

Whitney holds her own in court…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

Thankfully, the next day, Whitney held her own with dignity and poise but unfortunately, her next witness, Mick, completely let her down. He had a panic attack on the stand, making her look guiltier than ever. By the end of Friday’s episode, the poor girl had decided that her only option was to plead guilty.

Mick buckles under the pressure…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

At home, Mick was overwhelmed with guilt over betraying Linda. While she reassured him that she has forgiven him for Whitney, she has no idea the depth of what is to come…

Eastenders airs on BBC1 on Mondays @ 8:05pm, Tuesdays & Thursdays @ 7:35pm & Fridays @ 8:30pm

Neighbours: Goodbye to You

(Monday 28^th September – Friday 9^th October 2020)

Sheila, Kyle and Bea arrived home to find Levi having a seizure. While the other two panicked, Bea took charge, aware of his epilepsy diagnosis and knew exactly what to do. When he came to, he remembered that Yashvi had called him from the school needing backup and raised the alarm regarding the siege, although as ever in soap, it takes a hell of a long time for the police to actually do anything.

Levi was left with no choice but to tell the truth about his epilepsy and Clive realised that Dax had messed with his medication. Finally! Subsequently, Levi was suspended from the force pending a medical enquiry, which of course Sheila couldn’t help meddling with, meaning that he has been allowed back without any of the restrictions Clive put in place. When Levi found out what she had done, he was understandably furious.

Sheila had to tell the truth…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

At the school, Dax held Susan, Yashvi, Richie and Mackenzie hostage with a taser but was clearly losing his grip on the whole situation. Paul, Harlow and Hendrix unwittingly walked into the situation, prompting, Harlow and Paul to get chased into a toilet. Nice. Dax attempted to make his escape. The lights went off and there was generally a lot of running about while the police hung around not doing much and the kids’ and Susan’s loved ones waited worriedly outside. Somewhere along the way, Mackenzie got hit with the taser, sending her into cardiac arrest. Susan desperately tried to save her life and thankfully, Karl was right outside to help. But hero Yashvi took down Dax and he was taken into custody. She is basically the Karl Kennedy of the police force. And she’s only worked about four shifts.

Dax attacked the school…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

In some good news though, Mackenzie and Richie got back together and Paul invited Harlow to give a speech in New York to make up for the fact that she lost the election to Mackenzie. Also noteworthy, Dipi and Pierce held hands while they waited for news. It is beginning…

Shane left rehab, wanting to be there for his family but judging by how close Dipi and Pierce have become recently, it may be too late. Especially as all he seems to have done since he came home is get in the way. Nobody has been happy to see him, apart from perhaps Mackenzie who is always happy to see everyone.

While Yashvi is apparently the best cop in the world, she is apparently oblivious to anything going on in the lives of people she loves. Firstly, Bea had a crush on Levi and they lied to her about dating. Now, they’ve told the truth, Bea doesn’t fancy Levi anymore but he’s harbouring feelings for Bea. Typical. And Yashvi has missed it all.

But more importantly, Ned has got himself into serious trouble trying to raise funds for his exhibition by sending a ‘fan’ nude videos and pictures. The ‘guy’ has easily located him and has asked for more and more to the point that Ned has cancelled his account. He has kept it all secret from Yashvi and decided to focus on his real art instead. He used some of the money to take Yashvi away on a romantic getaway, alongside Roxy and Kyle. He was then horrified for his Fandangle commissioner to appear and turn out to be none other than Scarlett, the woman who became so obsessed with him last year that she ended up stabbing him. What are the chances?! She threated to expose the videos and pictures unless he painted her portrait as a gift for her fiancé. He agreed on the promise that she deleted everything. I mean, this hasn’t got disaster written all over it at all…

Scarlett returned to torment Ned…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

While Pierce was extremely excited about plans for the baby and even started talking about siblings, Chloe was starting to have doubts about the whole thing, including her marriage to Pierce. Despite the awkward situation, she ended up turning to Nicolette about it all, who advised her not to act hastily and take some time to clear her head. But when she had to leave for her first shift at the hospital, Chloe continued her walk alone where she began to have a miscarriage.

Nicolette was an amazing support to both Chloe and Pierce and proved herself to be a beautiful, true friend. When Fay returned from her trip with David and Aaron (who has designer stubble now), full of excitement about the baby and the baby shower, Chloe ignored Pierce and Nicolette’s pleas and decided to go through with the shower so as not to break her mother’s heart. Sadly, she broke down in the middle of it and admitted to having had a miscarriage. In light of recent events, Aaron and David opted to keep their surrogacy plan quiet. So, we’re bored of the fostering storyline after one kid, are we?

Pierce hit the roof when he discovered that Nicolette had been with Chloe moments before the miscarriage and when Hendrix revealed that Nicolette also has feelings for Chloe, he fired her and threw her out, despite how much it upset Fay. Insecure, much? Nicolette accepted it without putting Chloe in any worse a position by revealing that she had already resigned or that Chloe already knew everything.

Trying to be a good person and do the right thing, Hendrix told the truth about Rose using Toadie to get information on her husband James, not wanting Toadie to end up in legal trouble. Toadie was furious, not to mention hurt, having thought he and Rose had built up a good friendship since she started working for him. She begged him not to tell her ex-husband, which so far he hasn’t and when he realised that since he fired her she has no money at all, he bagged her a job as a beauty therapist, the thing she initially trained in, at the hotel.

Unfortunately, her first day didn’t quite go to plan as she had to practice on a couple of volunteers – Toadie and Mackenzie – and managed to burn Toadie’s face and tint Mackenzie’s eyebrows orange! They were very forgiving though and so was Terese who hired her anyway under supervision. When she got pretty much nothing in her divorce settlement, Toadie advised her not to sign it and opted not to tell her husband about her snooping. Karl and Susan have also picked up on a vibe between them… Post-Sonya, I found Dee very annoying and just couldn’t support him and Toadie. Perhaps it was because she and Toadie were together before Sonya and it was being treated as if she was the true love of his life, like Sonya suddenly didn’t matter. Plus Dee is actually quite annoying. But I like Rose. She’s quirky and funny and despite some initial dishonesty, I think I could get behind this potential relationship.

Rose begs Toadie and Mackenzie for help…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Neighbours airs Monday – Friday, Channel 5 @ 1:45pm and 5:30pm

Coronation Street: A Better Generation of Metcalfe

(Friday 18^th September – Wednesday 7^th October 2020)

Abi got herself into a bit of a pickle between hiding her addiction issues from Kevin, relying a bit too heavily on Peter, getting some feelings confused, Kevin’s sister, Debbie finding out (where did she pop up from again?!), Kevin finding out that being an addict is actual quite a big deal and you don’t get your kids taken off you for no reason and then it all getting sorted out rather easily.

Actually the romantic casualty of it turned out to be Peter and Carla who have been papering over the cracks in their relationship for a long time. He has been harbouring a lot of resentment over her ‘infidelity’ for a while. Well, let’s call it what it was. Rape. And quite frankly, I thought better of Peter than that. I really do hope that they can learn to communicate better and get things back on track. How many times can these two go to hell and make it back again?

Geoff was physically prevented from going to the wedding…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

Tim and Sally’s wedding was never actually cancelled so they decided to go ahead after all but failed to keep it secret from Geoff who was determined to attend, despite being specifically not invited. Good old Abi saved the day by tricking him into the conservatory and locking him in for the duration of the ceremony so he couldn’t ruin the day. As soon as he was released, he contacted the police, only for the wedding party to vouch for Abi, claiming that she attended the wedding. Craig, who was off duty for once, decided he didn’t want to know. And is this the beginning of a romance between Craig and Faye…?

Everyone vouches for Abi…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Daniel and Nicky got closer but ultimately, their relationship was doomed, which, quite frankly was a relief as the storyline was quite boring. However, Daniel did make himself an enemy of Geoff right at the end when he nabbed an opportunity to steal £5000 in cash from him. He handed the cash over to Nicky so that she and her child could go and start a new life together. Geoff caught him out when he spotted her giving some of the money back, having had no idea it was stolen and wanting him to spend it on Bertie. Once arrested, Daniel told the truth and Geoff opted not to press charges so long as he received an apology and the money back.

Michael takes drastic action to keep hold of his family…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Fully committed to Tianna and Grace, Michael got down on one knee and proposed. He was upset when she turned him down and informed him she was already in a relationship and was moving to Spain. In a bid to stop her leaving, Michael abducted Tianna and managed to get himself arrested. At the police station, he was informed that Tianna was not his and Grace’s child. Grace is Tianna’s nanny and she has been lying to him all this time. Now, I don’t like to blow my own trumpet but it’s not often that a storyline completely flaws me. I usually have at least a hint. But I did not see this coming at all!

Grace attempted to sort things out with Michael and explain things to him, including that she lost the baby she was pregnant with when they broke up, the one he assumed was Tianna. She begged him to run off to Spain with her (there was no boyfriend and the whole plan from the beginning had been designed to hurt him, except she developed feelings from him again). Despite clearly being tempted, he did the right thing and contacted the police instead. She never got the chance to tell him she was pregnant again.

Things at the hospital became even more heartbreaking when the clinic in Germany decided that little Oliver was not a suitable candidate for treatment. With the hospital certain that their interventions would not be beneficial to his life, Leanne and Steve were determined to fight them legally to keep their son alive. Nick went along with it for the love of Leanne and of course, Oliver but Tracy could be trusted to give an honest opinion: Oliver isn’t going to get better and sadly, it isn’t in his best interests to fight the hospital’s decision.

Nick, meanwhile, had other things on his mind when he finally met Sam, the little boy he never knew he hand. And gosh, he is a cutie! When a meeting with Sam conflicted with a legal appointment for Oliver (and Nick chose Oliver), Leanne laid into Nick for being distracted. Nick finally told her the truth about Sam and she asked to meet him. She genuinely tried with the little lad but it was clear that his energy and quirkiness and ambitions for the future broke her heart in light of her own son’s tragedy. She later told Nick that she hated him (Nick, not Sam) for having everything she now she didn’t have. Heartbreaking. Utterly heartbreaking.

Nick and Leanne are at breaking point…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

While the police confirmed that Kel’s death was accidental, things have become a little wobbly between Billy and Paul. This is clearly only going to get worse with the imminent return of Todd, who I presume is the person responsible for breaking into Eileen’s…

While professing to Carla that Sarah was ‘the one’, he then ended up sleeping with someone else in his office. Which Sarah overheard. Lovely.

Coronation Street airs on ITV on Mondays, Wednesdays & Fridays @ 7:30pm and 8:30pm

Hollyoaks: The Lines Are Drawn

(Monday 28^th September – Thursday 8^th October 2020)

After some soul searching, Liberty decided she couldn’t take the baby away from Sienna, as much as she longed to be her mother. Also, Liberty appears to be being haunted by a nurse that may or may not be real and sounds weirdly like Nico… The nurse was furious with her for handing the baby over to Sienna. I’m curious to see where this whole storyline will go…

Liberty is suffering with mental health problems after giving birth…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

When Brody and Sienna couldn’t agree on the baby’s name, Damon suggested they include Liberty in the decision. She chose the name Faith.

When Faith’s return home was halted due to an infection, Liberty was left in turmoil yet again. The hospital suggested skin to skin contact to help the baby grow stronger but it meant that Liberty’s heart broke even more. And of course the weird and possibly imaginary nurse was still lurking.

Toby was horrified to find some pages of The Red Door, the book written about the experiment done on him as a child, poking out of Mitchell’s bag. He tricked him into visiting him where he fully intended to harm him but the boys bonded instead and Mitchell helped Toby realise that he was more than an experiment and was perfectly capable of making a fresh new start.

The more he thought about it, the more Toby began to realise that once they escape the Doctor, Celeste continued to control him and for the first time, we saw hand movements and the way she speaks to him as evidence that he is correct. All this time, it has looked like she has been looking after him with all his anger issues and recklessness (I mean, let’s not forget, he did murder Lisa) but is she actually the more sinister of the two? Or are they as bad as each other but in different ways?

Celeste has learned to control her brother…
(Photo credit: Digital Spy)

Determined to be his own person now though, Toby threatened Celeste and decided to move in with Martine, who accepted him even when she found out that it was him who assault Felix months ago. He was worryingly proud of having manipulated his mother and not bothered about moving into dead Lisa’s room. Celeste was lost without him as they have been together their whole lives, albeit through a door for a lot of it.

As for Mitchell, Scott discovered that he was up to his eyes in credit card debt. That just doesn’t sound like sensible Mitchell and feels a bit like it’s come from nowhere. A rushed exit story, perhaps?

Felix continued to mess Grace around. You’d think she’d know better after her last boyfriend. Really, Felix wanted Martine but she told him she wasn’t interested and even if she had, Walter was quick to warn Felix to stay away from her! Felix had other problems, however when he and Warren decided to start working together at the garage but during a power struggle, Warren locked him in the garage, triggering past trauma of his abuser, Cormac. So of course, Felix has decided he would get some violent revenge.

When he couldn’t talk him out of it, Warren obediently lured Cormac to the Village where Felix confronted him about the abuse he suffered as a child. Eventually, Cormac admitted he had behaved that way because Felix was black and he apologised, although it’s unlikely that it’s sincere. Brody listened through the door, suffering flashbacks of his own ordeal with Buster, namely the apology he cruelly snatched away recently. When Cormac was finally released, a remark he made triggered trauma for Brody who punched him. When Cormac was undeterred and vile to Brody about the abuse he suffered as a child, Brody and Felix were left to look on as Warren brutally assaulted the man he had looked up to growing up. Will Warren have another death on his hands?

Cormac triggered Brody’s own memories of abuse…
*(Photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Jordan ended up on Victor’s bad side while Juliet’s popularity was just growing and growing. In the process, Victor and Jordan robbed Marnie’s café only to find no cash on the premises. It really shook poor Marnie up. Thankfully, Misbah was there to look after her. But when Jordan began threatening to take Juliet out, Sid felt he had no option but to rat him out to the police for dealing, landing him a potential fourteen years in jail unless he gave up some names to the bigger players. Victor attempted to terrify Juliet and Sid with an initiation ceremony but while Sid lost complete control, Juliet was utterly fearless. Victor handed over Jordan’s patch to Juliet who rejected her family and gave herself a new look.

Juliet easily passed Victor’s initiation ceremony…
*(Photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Leela and Peri were both horrified over Jordan’s arrest, although they both reacted in different ways. Peri was utterly furious, having trusted Jordan’s assurances that he had changed. Leela, who knew absolutely nothing of Jordan’s behaviour felt angry but also sad for him. She worried about him coping in prison but she also felt like she had let Sid down when she was meant to be looking after him. Neither Peri nor Leela have, as of yet, confessed to their relationship with Jordan. Now that will be an interesting episode. Sid, meanwhile, was delighted to have been allowed back into school but torn up with guilt for betraying his cousin, he tried and failed to get him off the hook.

Jordan is in big trouble…
*(Photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Tom and Yazz, who everyone thinks are love’s young dream decided to set Romeo and Cher up. Or at least, Yazz decided to set them up and I have a horrible feeling that Yazz is more into Tom than Tom is into Yazz. She even declared at the end of yesterday’s episode that she is in love with him and seems eager to plan their future whereas he clearly stated they haven’t said the L Word yet and are taking things slowly. Meanwhile, Romeo appeared to have backed away from Cher, who he was once so very keen on and managed to offend her and her entire family. Well done, mate.

Is Tom having second thoughts…?
*(Photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Maxine happened upon the idea of a photoshoot for expanding the business for the law firm. They also appear to be struggling for office space but weren’t they renting the salon? Isn’t that how Maxine ended up working for them in the first place?

Hollyoaks airs Monday – Thursday, 6:30pm on Channel 4 (sneak peek on E4, 7pm)

These reviews are based on the E4 episodes

Hollyoaks airs ‘Hollyoaks Favourites’ on Fridays, Wednesdays-Fridays, 7pm on E4

Home and Away: Off the Rails…

(Monday 28^th September – Wednesday 7^th October 2020)

A female officer supervised Angelo’s interview with Bella who coped remarkably well. Honestly, I don’t know what all the dramatics were about. She answered the questions fine, apart from possibly unhelpfully informing him that Colby hated Ross but she didn’t have a breakdown or anything. At this point in time, she’s coping and behaving a lot better than her brother, quite frankly.

Angelo is an even worse husband than he is a police officer…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Colby continued to work on Taylor, who I feel extremely sorry for. Firstly, she is married to Angelo. I mean, that’s a pity party right there. Secondly, she has been ignored and neglected for a long time by a policeman who makes Colby look moral and yet is so focussed on his job, he regularly forgets she exists. And now Colby has targeted her in order to seize as much information from her as possible. And the poor girl thinks he is being genuine. So she is going to end up really hurt.

While Bella suffered the consequences of running away, first the wrath of Colby and then struggling to work things out with Nikau, whose feelings were really hurt (although they did make up in the end), Colby’s friends grew seriously concerned by his reckless attitude, especially when Dean discovered that Angelo has bad blood with the River Boys.

When he learned that Taylor is a massage therapist, Colby helped her find some contacts through Willow and the gym. Of course, no murky storyline is complete without an actual massage scene, which inevitably leads to a make out session, which inevitably leads to Colby’s little sister walking in on them.

Taylor fell prey to Colby’s charms…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Bella was horrified to realise who Taylor really was and it almost led to a punch up between Dean and Colby. While Taylor was eaten up with guilt for betraying her husband, Colby managed to use the momentum to glean more information from her – Angelo had gained a forensic report from a car. He took things further by impersonating Angelo at work to get the report over the phone and rather proudly announced to Bella and Willow that he and Dean had removed every trace of DNA from Ross’s dead body from the car. Bella was upset. Willow was disgusted. Both of them were worried by his behaviour. Honestly, he always seemed so nice…!

Meanwhile, Dean had his own problems as he attempted to get to know his son, Jai but ended up pushing Ziggy away in the process as with Jai, comes Amber who has made it quite clear that she too wants to be in his life. With Amber setting the rules, Ziggy backed off, even moving into her parents’ house to give herself and Dean some space. Dean finally tackled Amber and after Willow ran some interference, Amber agreed to parent Jai together and not get in the way of his relationship. Willow also warned Dean not to step in with whatever Colby was getting himself involved with this time and not to get himself into trouble. He has other priorities now.

Dean loves being a Dad to Jai…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

In other news…

Justin struggled to come to terms with the idea of having the operation, to the point he refused to go ahead. He was furious when Tori attempted to pressure him to go ahead by inviting Ava to visit him and then couldn’t cancel her.

Jasmine objected to her counsellor wanting her to visit Robbo’s grave but reluctantly agreed when Tori took her there with Grace.

Alf, Marilyn and Ryder helped Owen connect with his now lost twin, Evan, particularly through music with Ryder lending him his guitar. Roo admitted to Alf and Marilyn that she was in love with Evan and thought he had felt the same.

Mac’s tenancy came to a sudden end, prompting her to move in with Ari, which was somewhat awkward with Tane, especially after he accidentally walked in on her in the bath. He resolved things by asking for opposite shifts at work so they should never be at work or at home at the same time if they can help it.

Home and Away currently airs on weekdays @ 1:15pm & 6pm on Channel 5

Sneak peek on 5Star, weekdays @ 6:30pm

These reviews are based on the lunch time episodes

Eastenders: Who’s That Girl?

(Tuesday 22^nd September – Monday 5^th October 2020)

Ian’s life plummeted even further down the toilet as it all came out about his theft of Max’s money. For the second time in a row, Max wrecked his attempt to raise the cash to pay him back, Sharon took him down a peg or two after the way he has been throwing his weight around with her since she turned him down and he continued to completely let his youngest son down. He really has become a terrible, terrible person.

Speaking of Max, he and Linda suddenly seem to be BFF’s, don’t they? I know they did that wife swap thing a while back but I didn’t realise they were besties now! However, Linda was quick to look out for Max when she realised he was being screwed over by Ian. And on a night out with the girls when she caved and had a drink, feeling stifled by Mick who was genuinely trying to look after her, Max stepped in and made sure she was okay. But of course, in soap, nobody can just be mates, can they? Of course they had to have a secret snog. Unacceptable!!!

Max hasn’t stolen anyone’s wife for a while…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

For now though, Mick is distracted by his dislike and discomfort with Frankie’s interest in his family. Tina has completely misread the signs that Frankie fancies her, leading to a more awkward moment than she even realises. But when Linda allowed Frankie to babysit (because her son was annoying her), Mick lost it and snatched Ollie away, demanding to know why she was so interested in his family. The young girl finally confessed that she believes his family is her family – that he is her Dad. Now, while I am annoyed at the potential rewrite of Mick and Linda’s entire relationship, I do like Frankie and I am curious to know where this is going to go. I am also excited at the prospect of Simone Lahbib coming bounding onto the Square, presumably as Frankie’s mother. Bad Girls reunion anyone?! I mean, just to wave my rainbow flag for a moment, any gay woman my age (maybe not even my age) was in love with Simone Lahbib back in the Bad Girls era. I actually cannot explain how exciting it is to think she is joining Eastenders.

Mick is shocked by Frankie…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Ahem. Moving on.

So, what on earth is going on with Callum, the nicest boy in soap? He’s only been in uniform for five seconds and he’s turning into some kind of dodgy cop, controlled by an even dodgier cop. He’s also managing to turn into a Mitchell, controlled by Phil. He’s making Martin Fowler look like he’s had the last year completely under control! Honestly, what are the writers playing at? I don’t like it. Callum is our equilibrium in Eastenders. He is the good amongst the dark. He is the moral compass. If you have him beating Phil’s gangster mates up and trying to fit Phil up with the police, what hope is there for anyone?!

Meanwhile, Gray’s murderous activities seem to have so far gone undetected. Although Kheerat raised the alarm with Mitch, Karen dismissed the idea completely out of hand. She is going to be so distraught to have believed in him so sincerely. Mitch did suspect him. He has always suspected him. Unfortunately, Gray used Mitch’s own guilt for being an absent father to deter him from any accusations. He really knows how to get into people’s heads. And the funeral is on the first day of Whitney’s trial. Of course it is.

Denise confesses all to Jack…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

In other news:

Martin had to persuade Ruby not to press charges against Stacey for the sake of the kids but Jean quite rightly didn’t welcome her daughter back to the Square with open arms.

Denise was shocked to be reunited with her son, Raymond when his adoptive parents were killed in a car accident.

Amy accused Isaac of smoking weed when he dropped her as a tutoring student, upset because she had a crush on him.

Stuart and Rainie participated in the first social distanced wedding, with him trapped inside a car. Very creative! She also announced that she was pregnant, which a lot of people have objected to as she was previously revealed to be infertile and they think it is unrealistic. I have two words for you: Sharon. Mitchell.

Jags and Habiba came out as a couple. Suki was not happy. She even wasted a perfectly good cupcake.

Eastenders airs on BBC1 on Mondays @ 8:05pm, Tuesdays & Thursdays @ 7:35pm & Fridays @ 8:30pm

Home and Away: Coming Home

(Monday 21^st – Friday 25^th September 2020)

Despite Bella’s objections, Nikau took the decision to find help when their car broke down and who should he run into by Mack (whose name I’ve been spelling wrong all this time, as it turns out!), Tane and Ari. He ran off but they easily tracked him down and by the time he led them back to Bella, she was gone. She had clearly made the decision to leave, the moment he had defied her and decided to get help.

Against her better judgement, Bella turned her phone on to a barrage of messages from Colby and Nik. When she listened to a voicemail from her boyfriend worrying that she had panicked about them sleeping together and begging to meet up, she relented and went to the meeting place he suggested. Nik and the others were relieved to see her but she was annoyed to realise that she had been tricked.

Back in Summer Bay, Colby remained under pressure from Angelo to bring Bella in to give her statement. And Angelo’s suspicions only increased when he spotted Colby on the beach, revealing his River Boys tattoo. To give him his due, he does have first-hand experience of what the River Boys were like. He immediately looked him up on the computer, delving into his history as a gang member. He also denied Colby any access to any of the files relating to the investigation into his Ross’s death. It’s funny, ever since I started watching Home and Away again (I actually stopped watching it because of the likes of Angelo and the River Boys ruining the show), Colby has always been presented as such a nice guy. I knew he had killed Ross but I couldn’t imagine it. But recent weeks are really bringing out such a dark side to his character. I can now.

Angelo is surprised to discover that Colby is/was a River Boy…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Interestingly, Angelo’s wife, Taylor then turned up. When Angelo left the Bay in 2011, it was to be a happy little family with Nicole Franklin and her little boy, George. She obviously couldn’t put up with him! And it doesn’t look like this woman is tolerating him very well either as she and Colby have been flirting from the get go. Whether Colby actually likes her or its purely strategic, I’m not sure. But he’s managed to take her for a drink and spend time in the gym with her in less than a day, all the time getting as much information from her as possible about Angelo. And she has complained bitterly about her husband not having time for her. She has also mentioned that he is obsessed with Colby and the absence of his little sister.

Colby wastes no time getting to know Angelo’s wife…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Smug Angelo was just about to set off for the magistrates to get an arrest warrant for Bella, with her having run out of time to show up for interview when she walked through the door with Mack. She had been persuaded by her boyfriend and friends that she had put herself and her brother in a lot of trouble by vanishing and it wasn’t doing anyone any good. Angelo almost looked disappointed. He refused to let Colby sit in on the interview. He even closed the blinds. Probably not the best idea when dealing with a victim of assault if you’re trying to make them feel safe.

Ziggy gave Dean her full support over Amber and Jai, although she privately admitted to Willow, her fears of losing him. We all know that despite the fact he never wanted kids, Dean is the most loyal person ever and would never let his child down. It’s not that I think Ziggy should worry about Dean cheating on her. He clearly worships her. But I get that she is worried about him becoming so consumed with Jai that he may not have as much room for her as he once did. And that’s really sad. They make such a brilliant couple, especially knowing they are together in real life.

Anyway, Amber introduced Dean and Jai and despite some initial from the little boy, who is beyond cute, the pair got on like a house on fire. Amber decided to just introduce Dean as a friend though, not wanting to push things too much at first, although Dean was clearly eager for his son to know who he was.

Dean meets his son…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

Justin has been getting very clumsy and forgetful lately and is clearly in a lot of pain, still unnoticed by either his girlfriend or his sister who is a Doctor. Well, they took notice when he had a terrible back spasm and collapsed at the garage, spilling a load of chemicals in the process. Thankfully, Alf happened to drop by and pulled him away from the chemicals and doused him in water before phoning for an ambulance. Good old Alf. What would we ever do without him?!

After a lot of tests, Justin was informed that he has a lesion/benign tumour on his back, which is basically a cluster of blood vessels that are pushing on the spinal cord. The back spasm he had at the garage was one of the blood vessels bursting. The situation requires surgery, which could potentially leave him paralysed and there is a chance that the tumour could grow back again. Justin decided he didn’t want to go through with it.

Justin gets back news…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Marilyn attempted to help Roo process Evan’s death when she thought she had seen his ghost in the Bay. Meanwhile, Alf and Ryder got the shock of their lives when the spitting image of Evan turned up at the Surf Club. They approached him and discovered his name is Owen and has no idea who Evan is. Bringing him home, Marilyn and Roo, in the middle of their séance, got quite a shock themselves!

Recalling that Evan was adopted, Ryder was sure that there must be some connection between the two men. Owen agreed to stick around and explore things. Even for Home and Away, this is quite a stretch of a storyline when it comes to killing off a character and keeping the actor in the show!

Home and Away currently airs on weekdays @ 1:15pm & 6pm on Channel 5

Sneak peek on 5Star, weekdays @ 6:30pm

These reviews are based on the lunch time episodes

Neighbours: #Fandangle!

(Monday 21^st – Friday 25^th September 2020)

In his desperation to raise funds for his exhibition, Ned stripped on video for one of his subscribers on the aptly named, Fandangle. Unfortunately, some leaflets in the background gave away his location, prompting the guy to message him to say he would visit him in Erinsborough very soon. I mean, he must have been zooming in pretty close! Spoiler Alert: It’s not a guy. It’s someone who already knows exactly where Ned lives and has been interested in his fandangle for some time… Eek!

Guilt ridden over Dipi’s Shane Pain, Roxy enlisted Pierce and Sheila’s help in organising a karaoke afternoon, which actually succeeded in cheering her up. It also succeeded in healing the rift between the two women.

Toadie and Rose continued to bond, sharing a love of practical jokes. Karl even noticed that there could potentially be a romantic connection. I noticed it too, which is why it is so annoying that she is only working for him to get some information from his files. She comes across so nicely. She is funny and charming and there seems to be a real connection there. I mean, obviously she’s no Sonya but she’s much less annoying than Dee. I don’t want her to be a liar. It’s so frustrating. Because she is a liar. She even got caught photographing some files by Hendrix and lied her away out of it by sounding like she was holding her hands up and confessing! That is an expert fibler if I ever I saw one! Hendrix agreed to keep her ‘secret’ by persuading her to hand over poor Mackenzie’s speech for the Council. Rose then bagged Toadie’s log in details and continued her deceit.

With Paul and Hendrix working on Harlow’s campaign, Mackenzie was largely working by herself until Rose stepped in to help her. She continually rejected disgraced Ritchie’s offers of help. Things had already started to turn sour between the girls but it was the straw the broke the camel’s back when Hendrix gave Mackenzie’s speech to Harlow (who was going first). Poor Harlow delivered the speech without having any idea it was stolen. Mackenzie was furious and then had to give a completely improvised speech herself. Susan was very proud! Harlow decided that Mackenzie’s unrehearsed speech was better than anything she could ever have delivered and she was the best person for the job. Now, those are some friendship goals! You know, assuming Mackenzie is in a forgiving mood.

Mackenzie feels betrayed by Harlow…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Chloe and Pierce were excited and relieved to find out that their baby was a boy but more importantly that he has low Huntington’s markers. They can finally relax into the pregnancy, knowing they can enjoy it now and go ahead. Not that Chloe actually seems very relaxed.

However, things became all too much for Nicolette, who decided she had to resign her job. Chloe was devastated and begged to know what she could do to keep her. Nic eventually burst out her true feelings for stunned Chloe who was kind but remained committed to her boring husband. Nic eventually agreed to stay on until Fay could transition to a new carer. Throughout, Jane was so supportive, even suggesting a weekend away with her daughter to clear the cobwebs. I am so happy they have properly reunited.

Nicolette confesses her feelings…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

Yashvi got herself suspended at work by sticking her nose in a bit too much, trying to prove Dax’s connection to River. She all but proved it until River turned up beaten to a pulp (by Dax) and named her as his assailant.

While Yashvi was suspended, Dax warned Levi away from supporting her and just to make sure, he worked out that he was epileptic and messed about with his medication. So when Yashvi, Levi and newly returned Bea (with very nice hair) discovered yet another link, this time between Dax and Jeremy, the guy who torched all the files during Finn’s trial, it essentially put them all in danger.

Yashvi headed to the school (in uniform, despite her suspension) and finally identified the school dealer, Lacy who also gave up Dax. While Levi suffered at home, having an epileptic fit, thanks to his mixed up pills, Dax stormed the school, desperately trying to keep control and threatening Yashvi with a taser. Oh dear!

New recruit, Yashvi is clearly too much for Dax to cope with!
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Neighbours airs Monday – Friday, Channel 5 @ 1:45pm and 5:30pm

Hollyoaks: The Monster Unleashed

(Monday 21^st – Thursday 24^th September 2020)

Juliet bravely came out to Peri who was really kind and understanding but sadly, she didn’t feel the same. For now. We all saw the flashforward! Although, several spanners may have been put in the works with filming all that due to the lockdown, I imagine. Will they even have time to pull it all together by the end of the year?! Time will tell, I guess.

But for now, Peri has told Juliet that she only sees her as a little sister, leaving heartbroken Juliet no choice but to follow Victor’s instructions and move back in with the Nightingale’s. She does so by coming out to them and while Victor lurks in the back of her mind, it’s clear that she is being earnest with them, especially Marnie who offers nothing but love and support. Juliet never wanted to hurt her in the first place. She loves her and thinks of her as a grandmother. She bought her a plaque to commemorate Nathan by way of apology for destroying his jacket. I genuinely love their relationship and I do hope they can heal together, despite the awful mess Juliet has got herself involved in.

Sienna got the truth out of Brody regarding his visit to Buster. He took Damon with him and managed to get an apology in exchange for Damon promising to visit again. When he heard about the apology, Ollie also wanted to visit but having worked out that Damon wasn’t going to return, Buster took everything back and was absolutely vile to both boys. Ollie ran off to his Mum’s, making a sudden off-screen departure from the show. A new actor is going to take his place, apparently, another thing throwing off this flash forward plot, as of course, we saw the original actor as Ollie, suffering from drug addiction in that episode. I think the moral of the story is showing soap characters a year ahead in time is problematic. Granted, they couldn’t have guessed that a global pandemic was coming our way…

Damon supports Brody as he confronts Buster…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Brody had even more on his mind when Liberty suddenly went into labour and of course, being Sienna’s baby, nothing went smoothly. While Sienna was cornered over the growing tension between her and Warren, Liberty was rushed into surgery with a bleed and the baby was suffering with perinatal asphyxia. While the new parents got the news that the baby was okay, Liberty appeared to have a personality transplant; she went from being emotional and delighted to have provided her sister with such a gift, to being determined that she was the baby’s mother. Oh dear.

Liberty wants to keep the baby…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

Mandy grew concerned over Darren’s mental health as he became obsessed with some baby ducklings, one of which sadly died and his mood became increasingly erratic. She broke his trust by reading his journal, desperately worried that he was suicidal like Kyle. He admitted that he was feeling patronised and that he didn’t want to share his troubles with her because he didn’t want to worry her.

Mandy is worried about Darren…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Martine found Damon with The Red Door, the book about Toby when he was being experimented on, although Damon had no idea what it was. Snatching it off him, Martine determined to get rid of it but not before Toby and Celeste found her with it. Toby lost it with his mother but Celeste was far more reasonable. It’s funny really, as when these two first arrived, Celeste seemed far more vicious but it’s actually Toby that’s the psycho. Celeste actually wants to reach out to her family. At home, Celeste tried to calm her brother time but he insisted that reading the book would bring out ‘the monster’. I think that kind of already happened when you murdered Lisa, mate. Something about the way these two talk suggests to me that Lisa was not his first kill though…

Hollyoaks airs Monday – Thursday, 6:30pm on Channel 4 (sneak peek on E4, 7pm)

These reviews are based on the E4 episodes

Hollyoaks airs ‘Hollyoaks Favourites’ on Fridays, Wednesdays-Fridays, 7pm on E4

Eastenders: Goodbye Chantelle Atkins

(Friday 18^th – Monday 21^st September 2020)

Friday was a pivotal episode and truly one that will go down in soap history. It was unnerving, overwhelming and heartbreaking as Gray and Chantelle returned to the Square with the kids. Gray trapped Chantelle, who finally stood up for herself and informed him that she was leaving him. Of course, he ensured that that would never happen, forcing her to phone Kheerat and let him know that the plan was off. But when he caught her with her stashed cash and spare phone, all hell broke loose, resulting in her falling back on the open dishwasher.

For a while, I couldn’t work out what was going on after that. One of the kids woke up so he settled her. Then he told poor, dying Chantelle that he was going to get help. Instead, he took her spare phone and cash, wiped them and threw them away in an outside bin, making sure he was seen by as many people as possible round the Square. Then I realised he was making sure that people could confirm that he wasn’t in the house while his wife lay dying in the kitchen. He even had half a pint in the pub.

Returning home, Chantelle wasn’t quite dead but she passed away, suffering and in pain, moments after he arrived back. He then positioned a toy car to look like she had slipped on it and fallen back. Then he staged his arrival, dropping the pint of milk he had just deliberately bought in the shop, broke down at her body as he would genuinely have done, had the scenario been real and then called the police in tears. What a psycho. What a very clever psycho.

Gray tells his story to the police…
(photo credit: Digital Spy)

I cannot applaud Eastenders enough. This story has broken my heart and to have killed Chantelle off rather to have saved her from Gray is such incredibly brave way of propelling this story forward and making its point. My only criticism is that I desperately wish this hadn’t been Chantelle’s only attempt at escaping. The show could have gone a lot further by exploring and highlighting the services that are available to people who are the victims of domestic abuse if they had had Chantelle contact someone such as the Domestic Abuse Helpline or Women’s Aid just to name a couple of options. I think that could have done a lot of good for anyone in a similar position, to have seen the kind of help that was available. However, I hope that the grief of the end of this story will also do what it intends to.

I was also very impressed with how well they managed to film it, considering they had to social distance throughout! It was very creative and Toby-Alexander Smith (who has taken this story so much to heart) and Jessica Plummer were absolutely incredible.

Last night saw the fall out from Chantelle’s murder (although to be honest, not enough of the episode was focussed on it). Gray gave the police his perfect story, although Kheerat and Mitch were not so sure. Poor Karen was devastated at the loss of her child and had no suspicions at all.

Karen is devastated at the loss of her daughter…
*(photo credit: Digital Spy)*

Meanwhile, Callum was under pressure regarding Ben’s arrest and Ruby discovered that it was Stacey who had been stealing from her as revenge for ‘stealing’ Martin. And… Stacey returned! Hooray!